It was communicated to me in not so many words that every man I have ever had and have in my life that I consider a friend is not truly my friend. These men have hidden agendas - married or in a relationship - and would jump at the chance to have sex with me if I turned my back one day and my drawers accidentally dropped right to the floor! For some, I was told it is merely a waiting game. They will play the part of friend until one day an opportunity to get it comes fourth.
I personally have mainly had male friends since I was just a little kid. I just got along with men better, I dig their humor and candidness and loved to hang with them. We could talk about anything..sex, the girls they liked, cars, life...etc. I had a harder time establishing genuine bonds with women because so many were mean or selfish and there was a lot of games, backstabbing and drama.
So I was then informed that because of this secret agenda that men have, when people are boyfriend and girlfriend that both of them should not have friends of the opposite sex.
So, for the ladies..Do you have male friends and if so can you trust that they are REALLY just friends? If given the chance, would they want more with you? If you asked your male friend if he would get with you if given the chance and he said yes..could YOU still be comfortable being friends knowing this?
For the men...Do you agree with this?
For both..If you are involved with someone to any romantic degree is it ok to have friends of the opposite sex?.
Educate me people....
It was communicated to me in not so many words that every man I have ever had and have in my life that I consider a friend is not truly my friend. These men have hidden agendas - married or in a relationship - and would jump at the chance to have sex with me if I turned my back one day and my drawers accidentally dropped right to the floor! For some, I was told it is merely a waiting game. They will play the part of friend until one day an opportunity to get it comes fourth.
I personally have mainly had male friends since I was just a little kid. I just got along with men better, I dig their humor and candidness and loved to hang with them. We could talk about anything..sex, the girls they liked, cars, life...etc. I had a harder time establishing genuine bonds with women because so many were mean or selfish and there was a lot of games, backstabbing and drama.
So I was then informed that because of this secret agenda that men have, when people are boyfriend and girlfriend that both of them should not have friends of the opposite sex.
So, for the ladies..Do you have male friends and if so can you trust that they are REALLY just friends? If given the chance, would they want more with you? If you asked your male friend if he would get with you if given the chance and he said yes..could YOU still be comfortable being friends knowing this?
For the men...Do you agree with this?
For both..If you are involved with someone to any romantic degree is it ok to have friends of the opposite sex?.
I have always had friends of the opposite sex. In fact, one of my best friends for the past 4 years is male. He and I talk about everything..from movies and music to sex and relationships.
I think it all depends on the individuals involved.
I have always had friends of the opposite sex. In fact, one of my best friends for the past 4 years is male. He and I talk about everything..from movies and music to sex and relationships.
I think it all depends on the individuals involved.
As long as there is an attraction absolutely not. There has to be no attraction on either part for it to be strictly platonic. Men are very sexual, almost exclusively, so please never forget that. Although he may generally like a woman's companionship, if he is physically attracted to her in anyway it would more likely than not override his ability to keep it on a friendship level.
As long as there is an attraction absolutely not. There has to be no attraction on either part for it to be strictly platonic. Men are very sexual, almost exclusively, so please never forget that. Although he may generally like a woman's companionship, if he is physically attracted to her in anyway it would more likely than not override his ability to keep it on a friendship level.
Quoting: Originally posted by Snooky1957 PS.. I have also dated a few after we became friends and you know what?? when we decided taht it wasnt what we wanted.. we were able to return to our friendship because we were able to express our feelings truthfully..Anyone else ever have thatkind of friendship with a opposit sex???
yes i have and i have found like you it makes for a more down to earth friendship - even to the point of discussing each other's new relationships
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Quoting: Originally posted by Snooky1957 PS.. I have also dated a few after we became friends and you know what?? when we decided taht it wasnt what we wanted.. we were able to return to our friendship because we were able to express our feelings truthfully..Anyone else ever have thatkind of friendship with a opposit sex???
yes i have and i have found like you it makes for a more down to earth friendship - even to the point of discussing each other's new relationships
From my experience... men & women CAN be friends... some of my bestest of friends have been of the opposite sex. It definitely depends on the person. Some people are not able to be friends with opposite sex for whatever reason. Sometimes one or other has or developes more than just friendly feelings, and good communication helps. I know a couple that were friends for ten years and decided one day they were in love with each other, and have been married for 7 years now.. so you just never know about these things.
From my experience... men & women CAN be friends... some of my bestest of friends have been of the opposite sex. It definitely depends on the person. Some people are not able to be friends with opposite sex for whatever reason. Sometimes one or other has or developes more than just friendly feelings, and good communication helps. I know a couple that were friends for ten years and decided one day they were in love with each other, and have been married for 7 years now.. so you just never know about these things.
I truly believe that men and women can be friends. Some of my male friends have hinted at it becoming more but good communication and talking it out usually settles it the expectations. I have found that these heart to heart talks give more appreciation to the friendship and takes pressure off of any unspoken expectations.
I truly believe that men and women can be friends. Some of my male friends have hinted at it becoming more but good communication and talking it out usually settles it the expectations. I have found that these heart to heart talks give more appreciation to the friendship and takes pressure off of any unspoken expectations.
PS.. I have also dated a few after we became friends and you know what?? when we decided taht it wasnt what we wanted.. we were able to return to our friendship because we were able to express our feelings truthfully..Anyone else ever have thatkind of friendship with a opposit sex???
PS.. I have also dated a few after we became friends and you know what?? when we decided taht it wasnt what we wanted.. we were able to return to our friendship because we were able to express our feelings truthfully..Anyone else ever have thatkind of friendship with a opposit sex???
Bottom line.. Yes.. Very much so.. A frendship lasts between men and women when both in the relationship go in it with the idea of friendship alone.NO EXPECTATIONS. put aside the "what if's" and just be your genuine self.. do your best to just get to know them before anything else. its truely worth the effort. Expect nothing from each other and see what develops..I promise you.. its a good thing.... I have many male friends and we have never EVER been sexual.. and I love them dearly... and Vice versa..Trust me.. Most men want that friendship FIRST..they may not admidt it but they do..I have had all my male friends tell me later that they value what we have...and they always come to me when they need advice or just someone to talk to OR when they have happy news..I am their first to know..I wouldnt trade them for nothing in this world.. God Bless! Chris
Bottom line.. Yes.. Very much so.. A frendship lasts between men and women when both in the relationship go in it with the idea of friendship alone.NO EXPECTATIONS. put aside the "what if's" and just be your genuine self.. do your best to just get to know them before anything else. its truely worth the effort. Expect nothing from each other and see what develops..I promise you.. its a good thing.... I have many male friends and we have never EVER been sexual.. and I love them dearly... and Vice versa..Trust me.. Most men want that friendship FIRST..they may not admidt it but they do..I have had all my male friends tell me later that they value what we have...and they always come to me when they need advice or just someone to talk to OR when they have happy news..I am their first to know..I wouldnt trade them for nothing in this world.. God Bless! Chris
I think they can. Though I have only one or two male aquaintances whom I would consider a "friend", they are not potential sexual partners. I believe that every man or woman who meets a counterpart that is available would run the thought through their minds, weighing the odds. That does NOT constitute, however, a deep, longing for all things carnal! Men and women are very sexual in nature, by design and psychology. I am confident, though, that we CAN converse, share dinners and car rides, email, talk on the phone, got to movies and (yes)even be friends with a person of the opposite sex. Yes, boys and girls, purely platonic relationships ARE possible! :) --True
I think they can. Though I have only one or two male aquaintances whom I would consider a "friend", they are not potential sexual partners. I believe that every man or woman who meets a counterpart that is available would run the thought through their minds, weighing the odds. That does NOT constitute, however, a deep, longing for all things carnal! Men and women are very sexual in nature, by design and psychology. I am confident, though, that we CAN converse, share dinners and car rides, email, talk on the phone, got to movies and (yes)even be friends with a person of the opposite sex. Yes, boys and girls, purely platonic relationships ARE possible! :) --True
from my frank perspective, every female friend i have, i have at one time or another "looked" at them as a sexual partner, and considered whether, given the chance i would say yes or no. like window shopping. It does not mean i would, given the chance.
I had this experience some months ago where an old female friend of mine and i got re-acquainted. I was interested in friendship only and she had a "hidden agenda". to the point where she offered me herself, no strings attached, on her birthday.... I responded initially but declined to follow through.
funnily enough, our friendship since then has faded. I am reluctant to get back in touch with her because i think she will take it as a signal that I am interesed in her in more than just a friends level.
Men and Women can be JUST friends, IMO.
from my frank perspective, every female friend i have, i have at one time or another "looked" at them as a sexual partner, and considered whether, given the chance i would say yes or no. like window shopping. It does not mean i would, given the chance.
I had this experience some months ago where an old female friend of mine and i got re-acquainted. I was interested in friendship only and she had a "hidden agenda". to the point where she offered me herself, no strings attached, on her birthday.... I responded initially but declined to follow through.
funnily enough, our friendship since then has faded. I am reluctant to get back in touch with her because i think she will take it as a signal that I am interesed in her in more than just a friends level.
Well I posted on a this subject not so long ago, and had varied comments.
Personally I think that men and women can be friends, but I think in a lot of cases it begins with either party wanting more, but settling for friendship.
Once friendship is established then I think that this is how it stays, and that not many a friends would go further even if given the opportunity.
Though in saying this if I trusted someone, and felt they were my friend then it would not matter if they harbored some hidden desire for me, as they have still earned my trust and the title of being a friend.
As for opposite sex friendships in a partnership, well yes I would be alright with it as long as I was included in the friendship, just like I would expect if it were the same friendship.
Hey Vegas good to see you here again. xx
Well I posted on a this subject not so long ago, and had varied comments.
Personally I think that men and women can be friends, but I think in a lot of cases it begins with either party wanting more, but settling for friendship.
Once friendship is established then I think that this is how it stays, and that not many a friends would go further even if given the opportunity.
Though in saying this if I trusted someone, and felt they were my friend then it would not matter if they harbored some hidden desire for me, as they have still earned my trust and the title of being a friend.
As for opposite sex friendships in a partnership, well yes I would be alright with it as long as I was included in the friendship, just like I would expect if it were the same friendship.
